A recent sociological study says the opt-out revolution is a myth. Educated women are not leaving the workplace in droves, it says. One finding it brings up that I can definitely understand: Some women are leaving the workplace after they have their babies because they have no choice. Their employers won’t give them flexibility or the chance to work part-time. They agonize over their decisions, and try to find ways to keep doing what they love, but they end up “opting out.” Sounds so good, opting out — it sounds like a carefree choice. But it isn’t. You basically feel like you were kicked out of the workforce.
Another factor mentioned in the study is husbands. Some single mothers might not be too sympathetic about this point, because they are usually fully responsible for their babies. But some of us who have husbands or partners might understand why some women leave the workforce because of their husbands, whether it’s their attitudes about who’s supposed to take care of the baby or their lack of or inadequate involvement. I can see how some women might be so overwhelmed by all their responsibilities at work and at home that they feel something has to give.
One thing that’s disturbing: Some women who “opt out” seem to be using taking care of their babies as an excuse to leave a job they hate, or weren’t feeling particularly challenged by. In these cases the child-rearing seems to be a fall-back option. It’s almost like being raised by someone who just isn’t that into you. I just hope like heck these types of moms eventually find that raising their babies is actually a job they can love.
1 Comment
July 1, 2008 at 7:15 pm
I agree with this posting. I didn’t realize how hard this decision would be until I myself experienced being a first-time mom. One would think that more employers are “hip” to the fact that parents (both moms and dads) need more flexibility to care for their families and recognize that offering flexibility is all part of employee retention (a.k.a. savings for the company). Unfortunately, the employers who are progressive enough to offer flex-time, telecommute and a sincerely understanding viewpoint are few and far between. Parents who want to devote the quality time to care for their children still need to find creative ways to bring in income, maintain their household and still be marketable in the professional marketplace. In short, parents have to be “supermoms and superdads” in order to raise even just one child. The decision to have children has become more important and consequential than ever. Kudos to those who decide to take on the challenge of finding the balance of career and parenting!!