Thinkingmama

No, I’m not getting divorced. But a front-page article on today’s Wall Street Journal about men who receive alimony wanting respect caught my eye. Some of the men complained about being called deadbeats. A couple of the men said they felt entitled to the monthly checks from their ex-wives because they put their careers on hold or hurt their earning potential when they took care of the kids full-time or let their wives’ careers take precedence. (Hmm… sound familiar?)

It seems only fair that the spouse who was not the primary breadwinner, regardless of gender, be entitled to alimony when a marriage ends. After all, if you “opted out” to take care of the kids or to support your spouse, you should be considered instrumental to your household’s success. But I think men will always be on the losing end of this battle because of societal norms. Stay-at-home dads are still pretty rare, and there seems to be a stigma attached to a man who doesn’t work outside the home. So when a couple divorces and he asks for spousal support, he’s bound to get even more grief.

On stay-at-home dads: A quick Google search is pretty telling. Blogs by such dads are titled Rebel Dad, I’m Not a Slacker and Modern Day Dad.