March 17, 2008...6:51 am
Is my work here done? Plus the real topic: What will my daughter think?
A blog post on blogher.com hits so many points about the “mommy wars” that it makes me think, once again, that everything has been said before. Everything has been written before. But I’ll try to go on. After all, no two moms have everything in common. My transition to stay-at-home motherhood will be different from others’ transitions.
Among other things, the post mentions a blogger who has given up her career to stay home with her two daughters. She has written her daughters a letter that hits so close to home it’s scary. I, too, have wondered: If I decide to be a stay-at-home mom forever, what will I expect of my daughter?
First, I worry that my staying home will cause my daughter to think that a woman’s place is in the home, and that she has no other real options. Sounds paranoid, probably, but I can’t help what I worry about. Second, I have vowed to make sure that as my baby grows up, she knows that her mother had a career, another life before she was born. I want her to know me as multi-dimensional. (Will freelancing and volunteering be enough?) I want all this so I can help her fulfill her potential.
After all, my husband and I plan to stress the importance of an education and send her off to college, encouraging her to pursue whatever career she desires. What, then, if she decides to become a stay-at-home mom? Will I be proud that she made the same choice I did?
2 Comments
March 20, 2008 at 6:06 am
As stay-at-home moms, we are in a unique position to teach our children things that we would not be able to if we were working outside the home (even if it’s the greatest job we’ve ever had). Our labor is not in vain.
March 26, 2008 at 5:25 am
You’re right, Aileen. I wasn’t a stay-at-home mom for very long, but I do believe that. … Now that I’m going back to work outside the home, the chance to telecommute at least a couple of days a week was something I jumped at. I’m hoping that because I will still be around my daughter more often than not, I can continue to be her most important teacher and main influence.
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